So today has been a world wind of events, .. I think that's what they call it. First, finally someone in the group has acknowledged the fact that there is something wrong, and we HAVE to fix it, before things get worse. No one's at blame, and there are no specifics, it's just that we can no longer go on pretending that tensions are not arising, and people aren't hiding behind smiling, happy faces anymore. We are no longer that group that you can say has no drama, because clearly something is wrong. If someone is hurting or someone needs to talk, then as a group shouldn't we all come together? I mean whatever happened to "if one of us falls, we all fall?" .. hmm, I guess it's just me then. I don't really get this friendship thing. I mean what makes a person your friend, really now. I mean, do the times you've had together really mean anything, or is all that just some fictional idea we've all just made up? It's whatevs, I guess. But I guess it leads to the other thing I was trying to get at. So I had my intervention with the other bhest, and when I say intervention I really mean it. I mean he told me things that I had to hear even though I really didn't want to. I know I can count on him, because he's not afraid to tell me the things he knows will hurt me, but has to tell me because it's the only way I'll ever learn. K well, props to you cause I get it now. Well technically, there isn't really anything to get, I mean as I've said before, there were no specifics, there isn't really any one at fault or to blame, if anything I blame myself for this whole situation, and with how I've been feeling these past few days .. but don't get me wrong I'm getting better. I'm not ALWAYS emo now -.- lol. *sigh. Today's conversations with people have really opened up my eyes to different insights, and advices people have given me have really helped. But the main question on my mind still is, how do you tell someone something they don't want to hear? How much longer can you hold in something you've been wanting to just let out, but by keeping it inside you're protecting the people around you? All I know is that because of those questions, I think that's what's igniting that ball of pain inside of me. The pain that hurts like there's no tomorrow. I just want that pain to go away, and when I call for help, I've felt like no one has been there to hear my screams, so holding on is the only thing left of me to do. But, I've given up. I can't do it anymore, the pain is building up, and it hurts. I honestly don't know if any of you have felt that type of pain, but I'm telling you. It's there and it sucks, it hurts like a fucken bitch, because no one can fix it, although we all hope that we can find someone that will. I just want the pain to go away, is that too much to ask?
"You show people what you're willing to fight for, when you fight for your friends."
- HILARY CLINTON
"I saw what he went through. The crying, the screaming in pain, and how much it hurt. I watched and feel in my heart that people shouldn't go through that."
- DICK VITALE
